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How to handle a colleague you genuinely cannot stand — professionally

by Ridzuan Daud·May 22, 2026

I work closely with someone I find deeply frustrating. This is not a toxic situation, they're not doing anything wrong per se, but our working styles are so different that every interaction takes energy.

What I've done that actually helps:

Reduced unnecessary contact. I only interact when the work requires it. I'm not rude, but I don't manufacture reasons to engage.

Assumed positive intent. The behaviours that frustrate me (over-explaining, talking over people, needing constant validation) are probably not malicious. This frame makes it less personal.

Identified what I can influence. I can't change their personality. I can control how I respond, what I put in writing, and how much mental space I give the situation.

Talked to my manager. Not to complain, but to flag that collaboration with this person is challenging and to ask if there are workflow adjustments. Framed as a productivity question, not a personal one.

I still find them frustrating. But it no longer actively harms my work.

#difficult-colleague#workplace#professional#conflict
3 comments

Comments (3)

Hasnita Hashim

The company milestone party where the CEO gave a 40-minute speech about himself and then spent 10 minutes on the 1,000 employees who actually built the company.

Leo Chin

Long service awards where you get a trophy and a handshake are so much less meaningful than public recognition and a real bonus. Know the difference.

Zura Hamdan

The best company milestone I witnessed: they gave every employee an extra week of leave in the year they hit 10 years. Simple, meaningful, memorable.

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